The Old Guys

Sally's having a party and Tom and Roy are desperate to be invited. They offer to help Sally prepare for the party in the hope that this will secure them an invitation. Sally, meanwhile, is very keen for Amber, Tom's daughter, to meet her successful and available son, Steve. Tom approves as this could help his own efforts to ingratiate himself with Sally. Tom and Roy's efforts to get to the party are hindered when Tom joins Roy on his daily walk and falls and injures himself. Now Roy has to nurse Tom 24/7 and still help Sally with the party preparations. Even if they finally do get an invite, they realise they may have chosen the wrong day to have a competition to find out who has the strongest bladder...

Roy is feeling depressed. On Amber's suggestion, he goes to see therapist Ned. There Roy tells Ned all his secret dreams and fantasies about Sally but is horrified when Sally meets Ned and there is a mutual attraction. Meanwhile, Sally is standing in the local council election on the 'Save the Post Office' ticket. Roy volunteers to be her campaign manager in a bid to spend more time with her, but when Ned turns up, unannounced, at the post-results dinner party, Tom and Roy take desperate measures to stop Ned meeting Sally again.

Amber attempts to impress her new boss Marianne. Roy attempts to teach Amber to cycle so that she can impress Marianne who is a keen cyclist. Tom discovers that if he was married he would be able to get a lump sum of money from his pension.

Tom and Roy are devastated when they discover that Sally has fallen in love with Mark, an old flame from her past.

Tom and Roy decide to take up Sally's offer of a week in a Highland croft when they decide that they need to get away for a while. When Tom gets bored he invites Amber to come stay. Amber is surprised when she sees Sally with Steve when she goes to a pub with a local man and Tom tries to make sure that they don't meet.

Roy visits Katia, a Belorussian prostitute in Soho. Emboldened by his friend's actions, Tom decides to start seeing Katia as well.